Sunday, December 31, 2006

Another perspective:

He also has a very good point. He actually looked at this from outside the box. I salute him. Check out what I am talking about here.

The news is irritating me...

Ok, so I will quote some things from this article that are really getting on my nerves:

* ""We wanted him to be executed on a special day," National Security adviser Mouwafak al-Rubaie told state-run al-Iraqiya television reports AP" Speacial being Eid????

* "
Officials wanted to reserve the occasion for Saddam alone." Why? Did they fear he might get offended if others were hanged after him?

* "
President Bush said in a statement issued from his ranch in Texas that bringing Saddam to justice "is an important milestone on Iraq's course to becoming a democracy that can govern, sustain and defend itself, and be an ally in the war on terror."" A few questions to Mr. Bush: Who and when will they hang you? Will you go after Saudi next, seeing as it has no human rights to speak of, and absolutely lacks anything even resembling democracy? You want Iraq to join in the war against terror? Is that before, or after the different sects finish each other off through the civil war? Umm.. who will they fight anyways? Themselves or Afghanistan... or will you come up with another "Axes of evil"???

* "
"This is the end of an era in Iraq," al-Nauimi said from Doha, Qatar. "The Baath regime ruled for 35 years. Saddam was vice president or president of Iraq during those years. For Iraqis, he will be very well remembered. Like a martyr, he died for the sake of his country."" Since when did a tyrant suddenly become a martyr? Granted they had no right to kill him, but HELLO!!! How can they make him into a victim? The only thing he is a victim of, is Arab treason... no more, no less. It is something every Arab politician is used to by now, so i don't see how it could have affected him.


A tribute to Mr. Yellow

From here

Saturday, December 30, 2006

Eid Ad7a Mbarak

I miss my family.... =(

May you all have a wonderful Eid, spent with those you love the most.

On the big, bad tyrant being gone...

There is something fishy about this whole thing. something does not seem right. I mean, they never set the date for his execution, and then, within 24 hours, the date had been set and he had been killed. Also, I do not believe he died fairly. When I say that, I mean that I do not believe he died on the hands of Iraqis. (Remember that I do not approve of Capital punishment, but if somebody has to do it, it should be the people involved, NOT the American scum that is there). The Americans went into Iraq, displaced him, took him to jail then court, ordered elections, allowed the new government to form, is STILL there and not doing much about the civil war they created. Saddam was a tyrant, was crazy, was an asshole, but with him around, the civil war would not have taken place. Plus, who do the Americans think they are anyway to do what they did? I STILL can not believe they were welcomed with open arms. Kind of reminds me when the Taliban took over in Afghanistan. Did they not do so with the aid of the Americans? Were they not trained by them, given weapons from them? So, Taliban rolls into Afghanistan to free it from the "Communist Russians", then take over as Gods, are STILL there and now fighting the Americans.

God, history is filled with so much blood. Anyways, back to Saddam, another flaw in the story is that it is Eid. Even if the Shia's celebrate Eid one day after the Sunni's, it is still a holy day, it is the day when all the hijaj stand on Mt. Arafe and pray. It is EID!!!! It is the one were Muslims celebrate God's gift to the prophet Abraham as he was about to sacrifice his only son for God. God sent him a sheep instead. It is the day when God refused the sacrificing of a human soul in his name. Yet, here we are, sacrificing one. I am not saying that he did not deserve it, please, do not get me wrong... All I am saying is that this way, a right has not been made, not to him, not to the people. He should have lived. He should have lived to see himself in a dungeon, tortured, barely fed. He should have lived to see himself treated as a dog, living like one also. He should have lived in nasty conditions until God chose to end his life. This was too humane... and too inhumane.

So, the soul has been sacrificed, and the sheep (ALL the Middle East, including Iraq) is still being fed and fattened before it too, is killed.

Below is a video from Al-Arabiya showing Saddams' final moments, leading up to when they put the rope around his neck....


They just hanged Saddam?!!

I'm in shock, more on that later when I can actually process what is happening...

Friday, December 29, 2006

On dreams...

You know the saying "sometimes you miss someone so much that you want to pluck them from your dreams and hug them for real"??

Well, that happened to me last night. I missed someone very much, and I dreamt that that person was actually there. It was so real, that i actually woke up expecting that person to walk back into the room. Expecting to see, smell and hear that person. However, it did not happen, and I felt disappointed.

On the upside of things...

My headache is finally gone.



I do not know why, but I just thought of something. I have been living in my apartment since August 2002, that is over 4 years, and to this day I have NEVER had to change the kitchen lights. They never went out. Ever.

Is that not weird?

Today sucked the big one...

... and hard!!!

First, I wake up to find out that the one friend I was counting on spending ALL of January with wont be here until the 22nd. Which means that will give me only 9 days to hang out with her. I will not say anymore about this as i am totally upset about it.

Afterwards, I fins out that there has been a mix-up in my graduation ring delivery and I got somebody else's' ring. I called the company, left a message and have yet to hear from them.

3 hours ago I got a massive headache and it is till there.

Crap... I miss C, I wish she was here right now...

Thursday, December 28, 2006

Saddam news

So now Saddam wants to be seen as a hero, a martyr?

Although I think he sucks, and that the oxygen he breathes is too good for him, i do not believe anyone, not even the state, has the right to end somebodys' life. Capital punishment does nothing, in my opinion, to obtain justice. My argument is as follows:

If someone tortured and killed all those people, would it not be better to just let him live out his whole life, in a small cell in some prison, with nothing he was ever used to and no chance of appealing? Would it not be better to let that person lead a miserable life, one that will maybe mirror that of those that survived his lunacy?

Another point is that well, life is precious. It is a gift from God and therefore, He should chose when to end it. We should guard it and hold onto it. Therefore, even if it were a tyrant such as Saddam, I believe he should be left to live. What good will it do anyone if he was hanged? Or even given the lethal injection? Or poisoned? All these are too humane and too fast for him. They can not kill him by putting him in a gas chamber, or by exposing him to nuclear material. He will never feel the pain he inflicted on others, and even if he did, he will only feel it for a few seconds before he dies. Whereas if they let him live in the conditions I stated earlier, he will feel the pain, he will suffer, and he will wish he DID die.

Ahhh, I am so against capital punishment. I think life should not be taken by anyone, not even by the state. Righting a wrong with another wrong does not make it right. No human being should kill, for any reason what so ever. Period.

miss you girls

i miss you C and L. hope you guys are having the time of your lives.

Wednesday, December 27, 2006


I am bored.

Monday, December 25, 2006

On the way to overcome things:

'This is the way of peace: "Overcome evil with good, falsehood with truth, and hatred with love."

- Peace Pilgrim


Merry Christmas everyone, may it be filled with health and happiness.

Wallet Update:

I got it back.

End of discussion.

Sunday, December 24, 2006

On rethinking stuff..

Wow, it is amazing what constitutes an emergency on different peoples' parts. It is surprising just how much our priorities are different. It is also surprising how far and long we will go to obtain them or get them accomplished.

I think it is time I rethink my priorities and my emergencies.... I need to accept it as the ultimate truth and move on before this whole thing leads to any casualties.


Saturday, December 23, 2006

I am STUPID!!!

Why, you might ask? Well, to put it this way... i forgot my wallet with one of my friends. I did not forget it in the apartment or in the car or anything like that. No, I forgot it with him at his work. I gave him my wallet to put in his laptop bag because i was too hungover to carry it. Then, I left. As simple as that. Worst part?? It took me a good hour or so to even realize it. How stupid is that? Of course, it is almost 10 am the next day and I still have no wallet. What that means is that I am card-less, cashless and ID-less. Guess I have to stay at home until I get it back....

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

The sad truth of Lebanon

This video reflects the sad truth...

Maybe if they stop religion from interfering in their daily lives, they could finally unite...

Monday, December 18, 2006

The road leading to a mental breakdown

Something is not right today... I do not feel well. My stomach is hurting me, I feel sick and very lightheaded. I also feel down. I was alright until I bumped into a friend of mine, Danny. He started asking me about "what I was going to do for the rest of my life", "where I am headed" and so forth. After that conversation, I just felt sick. I have been ignoring these feelings, ducking these conversations, hiding from reality.

Crap... reality caught up with me. Time is running and passing me by, no matter how much I try, I do not have enough hours everyday to do the things I want to do. I want to chill/relax/socialize/be alone/have fun/cry/watch movies/study/read books/go out for walks/say goodbye... that is a shitload of things to do in so little time.

How am I supposed to say goodbye to four years of my life? Four years that contributed to the person I am today. How am I supposed to easily flip this page and start an entirely different one? How am I supposed to do all this while forcing a smile on my face and holding back the tears in my eyes? How do you say goodbye to the most important and dear people in your life?

The hardest part of leaving here is not the leaving, its the moving on. I have formed my own little family here, the bond I have with them is so strong that I know distance can not break it. However, what is hard is the fact that I have to pick up and leave. I have to start a new life, a new me has to be born. I have to try and make the best of it. In short, I have to learn t live without those people in my life. I will no longer see them everyday, I will no longer speak to them everyday... I will no longer go for a walk and bump into them. I will no longer go to my coffee shop, aka office, sit there and see them all. I will no longer do many things with them. Worst of all, I will no longer hang out with them.

My biggest fear is that when I leave here I know things will never be the same again. I know my friendship bonds are strong, but damn it, distance and time do take a toll on things. Sooner or later, we will all have different experiences and the things we have in common will be only a blast from the past. Another one of my fears, and this is my insecurity speaking, is that I wont be missed as much as I will miss them. They will still have each other, what will I have? Memories... yes, the memories I have are great ones, memories that are filled with everything from laughter to tears, joys and sorrows... those were great times... will I still be able to remember them in 5 years? 10 years? 20?

Leaving here is hard for one other reason... it is the not knowing when I will be back. It could be in three months, it could be in 12, it could even be in years for all that I know. Will I be able to survive that long? and if I do, will I be alright?

What is to become of me... what does the future hold for me... these are the 2 simplest questions I have and I need them to be answered... only time will tell.

My encounter with the Niqab

Ok, so I know being a Muslim girl who was born and raised in the Middle East would probably mean that the following is something that should not have surprised me at all... but it did.

I was waiting for the elevator to go downstairs in my building, it opens, and what do i find inside? A niqabi woman. Like yes, I know, God told us women to wear the hijab, to dress conservatively and so on... but why the niqab?

It finally hit me... if I, as an Arab, a Muslim, a Female can't accept it, how can most of the world? Why do so many woman opt to cover their faces? Their sign of dignity?

Well anyways, I think she sensed all this going through my mind because when she started to get out on my floor, I told her "this is the 3rd"... she gives me the nastiest look and says "you are going down, no?" SO............. I give her a nasty look in return, get into the elevator and close it, without responding to her. Now, my question is, does she live on my floor, or who does she know on my floor, and, did she get out of the elevator coz she did not like the vibe I was giving off? I forgot to mention that when I went into the elevator, the L button was pressed... maybe a mistake??????????

Sunday, December 17, 2006

O friends, where art though?!

L and C... where are you guys? You are not even updating your blogs. Ok, L i understand, exams and all... but C... WHERE ARE ARE????

Saturday, December 16, 2006


Whenever I sign into this blog of mine, I get a notification stating that I have one unpublished comment. So, I go to the comments section to see it and publish it, and I find nothing. This has been the case for over a month now, and it is starting to annoy me....

On another note, only a few days separate me from my last exam. The one exam standing in my way between being uneducated and becoming unemployed. I should seriously start studying for this class, it is just that I don't want to!! I will... today. I will force myself to. it is only one exam, and i might as well kick ass in it, right?

That is it for now... I'll probably be back later to blog about something or the other.

So true...

" That men do not learn very much from the lessons of history is the most important of all the lessons of history. " - Aldous Huxley

The reason for the above? Humans are stupid, selfish, ignorant, arrogant...

I could....

I could talk about the civil war that is about to erupt in Palestine and how sad it really is...

I could talk about Rumsfield leaving the Pentagon for good and what that might mean to the world and the Americans....

I could talk about Annan leaving the UN and Ki-Moon taking over....

But i will not. I will talk about global warming. It is December 15th, in Montreal, and it is 7 degrees outside. It is like spring. it is gorgeous. What is wrong in this picture, you might ask? Well, to begin with, it is mid-December, it is Montreal and we are getting screwed. We are supposed to have mountains of snow by now. We are supposed to be freezing our asses off... this is not good. No matter how beautiful it is or how lovely and comfortable it is. This is no good.

I could research it properly and tell you why it is not good, but if you can't figure it out for yourself, then you are ignorant. If you can't be bothered to look it up, then you are lazy, and if you know and you still do not care, well then... why should I care about educating you?

Thursday, December 14, 2006

Meen erhabi?

C, this is for you hun, for being the honorary Palestinian that you are...

Girls= Evil?

Are we realllly this bad?


Soooo true...

Click here to laugh your ass off.

Make sure your speakers are on

A step closer...

I went to get my graduation pics taken. It felt weird to put on the cap and gown. It felt good, like it was a statement that I am done. I accomplished something. I survived the four years. I did it.


Monday, December 11, 2006

On people

Who would have thought that a person I only met on a few occasions, someone who I have had limited interaction with, someone who I have never spoken to unless for formal and business reasons will be the one person to actually give me good advice about my future?

It is really funny when people you hardly know have such an impact on your life and are willing and able to give you such great advice.........

Stolen from a friends' notes:

I think this is beautiful....

They like to tell us that we Palestinians are “too angry”
That the case for Palestine will never be heard
because we aren’t ‘civilized’

“Those arabs,” they say,
no diplomacy, too hot blooded, undemocratic,
violence flows naturally in their blood
- terrorist breeding, jihad leading, crazy matha-what!!-

And, those Palestinian women!
“so fuckin irrational”- I heard one say
about my sister and I- after a late night debate
at café no name, way back when it was café supreme

All because when I address the occupier,
racist, fascist, genocide supporting
Apartheid promoting motherfucker
I SCREAM- as opposed to talk
I don’t ask, I make demands
And my demands are clear
No Justice, No Peace!
No peace without justice
And, no justice or peace without the right of return

it’s a simple mathematic equation …
My dad won’t smile until he’s sitting under that olive tree
That same olive tree that he was sitting under on the day
they dragged him out of his home
kicking and screaming
holding onto the soil of Palestine for the last time,
yelling like Tawfik Zayyid,
“Don’t you see, my roots are entrenched deep in this earth”
My roots are entrenched deep in this earth…
Deep in this earth, our roots are entrenched…

And so it goes,
He wont smile until he returns
I wont smile until he smiles
My kids wont smile until I smile
And the vicious cycle begins…

But I don’t care,
because I’m raising the revolution
I’m raising the next generation of the revolution
Stone throwing,
middle finger waving, keffiyah wearing, poetry writing,
Ghassan Kanfani style kids mixed with a lot of Malcolm X,
Too cool, oops, I mean
too revolutionary for school kinda kids,
Too busy screaming out, “I just don’t give a fuck!” kinda kids

The kinda kids who won’t be peaceful
Who will always remain lethal
until they return

Saturday, December 9, 2006


I have so much on my mind at the moment, I do not know where to start. Somehow, suddenly, I was overwhelmed by this feeling of fatigue, of weakness. I want to give in, I want to give up. What for, I have no idea. I do not know what brought on this sudden change of moods or anything, all I know is that it happened.......

Sad... so sad...

Is this not sad?

"73 percent of undergraduate college students think they will be a millionaire before the age of 40. "

From here

Tuesday, December 5, 2006

Interesting quotes

* The ideal should be to be capable of loving a woman or a man; either, a human being, without feeling fear, restraint, or obligation... "

One's life has value so long as one attributes value to the life of others, by means of love, friendship, indignation and compassion.

Simone de Beauvoir

Note To C:

Well C... looks like no matter how hard we try to stop obsessing over M&M's, we never succeed... Too yummy for us....


Bye bye class...

Today is officially the last day of class I had as a Poli Sci student at Concordia University. It feels kind of odd knowing that this is it, the end. No more stressing over papers, cramming for exams, or pleading for extensions. No more quizzes, exams or presentations. This is it. One more final and I would then officially close this chapter in my life to start a new one. It is a scary idea, but I'll leave that for another post.

Anyways, so I am done, I wanted to celebrate, but no one is free to celebrate with me. It is B's mothers' b-day, A's got a paper to finish, Ro has to study for 5 exams, Ra left for holidays, C is in Brazil and L is in Ottawa. Like wtf is this luck? Oh well, at least C will be back sometime in January and we will celebrate everything then.

Monday, December 4, 2006

My new addiction...

My new addiction is this website. It is the new You tube for Arabs. it has great video quality, and granted that its not completely done yet, will be a great hit one day.

Side note: Ikbis = press

Snow, finallllly!


Saturday, December 2, 2006


I have recently made a few new friends, friends I know I will be in touch with forever more. People that have the same friendship traits I do, if not more. People who are similar to me in the kind of friends they are, if not better. However, this saddens me. Here I am, making new friends, when I know that i will leave in exactly 60 days. Here I am, doing what I did not want to do, and that is getting attached to people all over again. This, you see, is hard for me as I do not know if i can handle saying goodbye to more people. I do not know if I can handle all this.

I promised myself I will get detached, I will distance myself from people, but its not working. I like hanging out with these people, I like talking to them and everything...

This is life, i guess... you learn to accept what comes your way and move on... One thing is for certain though, i will do my best to not lose touch. As one very wise friend put it "its like family, even though you are far away, there is still a bond". This is my family away from my family there. This is the family that has seen me mature, has held me when I was scared, picked me up when I was down, made me see life from a whole new perspective and much, much more. I owe so much to them, and I shall never forget that.

i love you guys, although i do not say it very often.. and i will miss you like no other. The thought of it scares me, but i will hold on, and we shall meet again. THAT IS A PROMISE!

Friday, December 1, 2006


I am tired, I am sick of fighting, I give up.

I no longer want to think about it, talk about it, feel anything about it. I am done.

I am leaving and it has finally sunk in. No more sugar-coating, denials, lies or anything.

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Me thinking...

i was thinking today, why can relationships not be simpler? Why do we have to complicate everything? Why cann't we just like someone for the sake of liking them? Why do we flee from those that show interest in us when we are not interested? Why do we not trust wen we know we should and vice-versa?


Monday, November 27, 2006


The following is a must watch, it will leave you wondering whether to laugh or cry, whether to be angry or amused, whether to love or hate him... you get the point.

Uncle Saddam


The Israelis want to talk peace now. Stupid Olmert has the nerve to say “We, the state of Israel, will agree to the evacuation of many territories and the settlements that we built there. This is extremely difficult for us, like the splitting of the Red Sea. We will do it for real peace,” AS IF!!!!!! Those settlements are built on STOLEN LAND! Those territories are STOLEN!!!!!!


You can read allllll about it here.

Saturday, November 25, 2006


I have had a massive headache since last night. It is one of those headaches that you know no amount of Advil will ever fix. It is 2:18 pm as I am writing this, I still did not sleep, and I still did not study. I am in no mood to do anything. All I want to do is sit at home, all alone. I know I should not, but that is what I want.

I was thinking about what my life was like in the past 4 years. I have been on a major emotional roller coaster ride. I am not going to bore you with the detail of four years, I don't even have the energy for them anymore.

Anyways, I should work today, but we shall see how that turns out. My neck also hurts. I am sitting down with a cold compress on it, but it is not doing anything major... its just feels good.

I started packing up. My dining room table is no more. My DVDs are at home, half of my knick-knacks are in boxes. Every time I need to disconnect from the world, I turn to packing. It is so hard, yet so simple. Just shove everything in a box. How do you know what to keep and what to throw away though? My flag is still on my wall. It will be the last thing to go down before I leave. What sucks is that this flag has been the first thing I see in the morning and the last thing I see at night everyday since I put it up. I sure am going to miss it.

Ok, so I am rambling about nothing, but whatever... That is what it all is really, nothing.

Adding salt to the wound

Teach this triple truth to all: A generous heart, kind speech, and a life of service and compassion are the things which renew humanity. - Buddha

Only problem? At this moment in time, I want to stamp on my heart, I want to cut my tongue and I want to screw humanity 1000 times over.

God, I feel so upset. I am so lost, I do not know what to do.

I am really upset with my best friend from AD. I have always been there for her, and now, when I need her the most, she is not there. I am truly sick and tired of being treated this way. I do not deserve this! I am a good friend, I drop everything if any of my friends needs me, I'd do anything to cheer them us, I'd reassure them I'd cry with them, I'd just sit and say nothing... ANYTHING! What do I get in return? That, from the person I least expected it from.

I agree

This actually makes sense...

On being sick...

This makes me sick.

Friday, November 24, 2006

Thursday, November 23, 2006

How did they know?!!!!!!

It may seem as if an era is coming to an end and you could even feel nostalgia for whatever it is that is passing you by now. This may not be about anything material; it's just time itself that continues to move forward. As much as you try to hold on to the present moment, it isn't yours to keep. Take the changes in stride by focusing on one step at a time as you head into your future. (22.nov.2006)


Wednesday, November 22, 2006

WTF is happening?!!

I was reading the news and I came across this article. I could not believe it. 3709 ppl killed in Iraq in the last month. That is a lot of people in one month. it is a freaking genocide!!!!


Me bored...

what i do?

C, i missed you today. we did not get a chance to talk...

Tuesday, November 21, 2006


When we are unable to find tranquility within ourselves, it is useless to seek it elsewhere.
- Francois de La Rochefoucauld

There are two mistakes one can make along the road to truth -- not going all the way, and not starting. - Buddha

Monday, November 20, 2006

On what is irritating me now

You know what I absolutely hate? I hate the way the news belittles peoples lives. I hate it when they report about deaths as though it was an ok thing. I mean, yeah, to die is part of life; however, to be killed is not. I was just ready this article on aljazeera international and what irritated me in the use of three little words: some 80 people. SOME? Seriously? you can not even take the time to do the research and come up with the right, accurate number? SOME? What? those people's lives are so insignificant that we no longer need to know?

Of course, if they were Israeli, Americans, British, Canadian etc it would never be some. it would be an exact number. It could also be followed by their names and a more thorough explanation of what had happened. But they are not. They are Palestinians. Palestinians living a fucked up life every day, not knowing whether or not they will live to see the following day. They live in such nasty and rotten conditions, it is a miracle a plague has not erupted yet. But still, they are not westerners, so why should anyone care? Why should the world take one minute to say a prayer for their dead, to weep for the children's' lost innocence, to cry for the broken families, to check on the poor and weak, to ask after the lost and disappeared, and to fight for their rights. Why should anyone bother? Palestinians are at the bottom of the human race chain. Who cares? I say, I care. I weep, feel, cry... I do and I am sure there are others like me out there. We just have to be heard and that is what we shall do... I will not rest until my voice is heard... I can not.


I have nothing to say. I am sick and tired from whining about my insomnia, depression, the guy, life.... So, i have nothing to say......

Friday, November 17, 2006


Today, I did absolutly nothing all day. I woke up at 8 am and then decided that I was not going to get out of bed for the day. Fastforward till 10 pm and I am stil in bed. Doing what? Well, I had a paper I had to finish then an online class to attend to. Apart from that, I did nothing. It felt so strange to me, especially since for those of you who know me, know that I do not know how to do nothing. Now, I feel stupid for wasting a perfectly nice day. Ok, fine, so it was raining, so what? I will miss the rain where I am going to soon.

Speaking of which, after speaking to a good friend of mine whom I shall refer to as E, I have decided that I should stop this wallowing. It is not going to change anything and it sure as hell is not serving any greater purpose. I should stop thinking of what I will miss when I leave and enjoy it now, while I still can. Mmmm... that was wierd. That statement does not belong in the same blog that states that I sat at home all day, not seeing or talking to anyone. Yup, off to a great start, aren't I???

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

On leading a routine-struck life..

You know you spend waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too much time in your favourite coffee shop when the guy that works there asks you to fill him in on something that took place a few days ago, and you actually know ALL about it.


Tick Tock...

... goes the watch. Time is now officially ticking and counting down until I leave my beloved Montreal. I just booked my ticket. First ever one way ticket I have ever booked in my whole entire life. It is funny, in my heart of hearts I am certain that one day, I will come back here, even if it was for only a visit. However, I feel like I have been just sentenced to death. It is so depressing........ One way ticket. Sounds so final. So dramatic. So... the end?!!

So, January 31st, take your time, there is no rush whatsoever. If you never show up, I will not be disappointed at all....

On stupid ass people

So today, i am sitting in my coffee shop, minding my own business, when this ASSHOLE next to me- who is Jordanian- starts saying that Palestinians have it easy in Jordan and nothing differentiates Palestine from the rest of the Arab world. His argument, and i quote " It wont make a difference for Jordanians if Israel invaded them as they are already invaded". Already invaded? REALLY? by the Palestinians?!!! The ASS!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOW DARE HE? It was his f***ing king that sold y land. It was his government that sold my land in order for them to create their precious JORDAN! Then, he has the nerve to tell me that Palestinians have it easy in Jordan, that the poor Jordanian kids used to give their lunch money to us so that Arafat could go build mansions in Paris. Really? Funny, i don't recall a Palestinian with a refugee status working in the Jordanian government! I know for a fact that if two people applied for the same job, one with Jordanian ancestry and one with Palestinian ancestry, the Jordanian one would DEFIANTLY get it. THEN he has the nerve to say that Palestinians have it good in Lebanon too. AS IF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! When people are denied their basic rights of working as doctors or engineers and are only allowed to work in something like 70 jobs only; when people can't even leave their houses or money to their children and families because once they die, they become the property of the Lebanese government by default; when people barely have electricity and some running water; when, when, when. WTF is he talking about? How dare he belittle the Palestinian crisis? How dare he say that "Palestine, meaning the west bank and Gaza, are back and that the Palestinians are the ones who don't want to go back"??? How dare he judge a people who have nothing in the world except one dream, and that is to return? How dare he assume that these people are happy with the way things are? Also, how dare he say that Palestinians should not state what new citizenship they acquired. I know of not one Palestinian that denies his or her roots. ALL of the ones i know state that they are Palestinian regardless of what passport they have. If we do not do that, then Palestine is lost and it is no longer ours.

God, i am soooooooo angry and upset. How dare someone who comes from such a country that betrayed us, our trust and everything, say those things, and with such smugness too?!!! Palestine is ours, it is rightfully ours whether anyone likes it or not. We shall return, tomorrow, the day after, or even 100 years from now, it is OURS AND WE WILL RETURN!!!!!!! Justice will prevail, and we shall rise from this. The struggle will carry one and will continue as long as the Palestinians have children and as long as those have children of their own. it is in our blood and it is something that no one shall deny us, ever!!!! It is ours and fuck anyone who does not believe so.

Monday, November 13, 2006

Buddha the wise

"Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, or who said it, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense." - Buddha

Don't you just love Buddha?!!

Sunday, November 12, 2006

Bday summary

So, my birthday has been over for a good few hours now. It was a wonderful birthday, i must admit. On Friday, a good friend of mine called me from abroad to "drink" with me. So, that is exactly what we did. Me, here in Montreal, and her, all the way there in Brazil. it was cool in a lame way, but it made me feel better about her not being here for my bday and all. Next, I went out to dinner with some friends. Funny thing is, I was about to cancel it at the least minute, but I am glad I did not. Everyone got along with everyone else perfectly and people actually appeared to enjoy their time. Afterwards, we all went to an Arabic party. At first, I must admit, I was not having much fun only because I HATE clubs, I HATE being t9uched by strangers and I most certainly HATE being in any place that is that packed with people. However, as the hours rolled on by, I enjoyed it more and more. Music was good, they played Arabic and Techno; and boy can my friends shake it!

Next came home, Two of my friends were crashing over and two more of my friends came over to hang out. We tried to play cards, but no 2 of us agreed on a game, we tried playing Uno, but that didnt work out very well either. So in the end, we settled on just making fun of each other. Finally, to end a great night of partying, chilling and hanging with friends, they left at 5-ish and by 7, we were all sleeping like babies.

But this is not the end of my bday, oh no.... at 12 pm my friend calls me and tells me to get ready as she was going to pick me up and take me for a massage. What a massage!!!! It was a hot stone massage and it was GREAT! I was so relaxed afterwards, it is hard to explain. After massage, we went for lunch and then she dropped me home. That left me with three hours to take a shower, rest an get ready to go to my friends' house for his bday! Needless to say, i did not rest. So we went over, it was fun! it was a nice change of pace from my party weekend. Very laid back, very relaxed. Towards the end though, I was so tired, I could no longer even make out what someone is saying. Finally, at exactly 12 midnight -freaky, eh?- I walk into my house and say goodbye to my birthday. It was now, officially over.
=) =) =) =)

Friday, November 10, 2006

Great Movies update

Marie Antoinette was the worst movie i have ever watched in my life. it is a sorry excuse for a movie, a waste of time and even the little energy you put into watching it. COMPLETE waste of 10 bucks.


Thursday, November 9, 2006


I can finally say that today was a good day. Started out well, ended well, the middle was not too bad either.

That's an advancement!


Wednesday, November 8, 2006

Words of wisdom:

"Whatever you may be sure of, be sure of this, that you are dreadfully like
other people." - James
Russell Lowell

matters of style, swim with the current; in matters of principle, stand like a
rock." - Thomas

is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city." - George Burns

Tuesday, November 7, 2006


Sometimes, i feel that my life revolves around a theme song. Today's song?

"Bent" for Matchbox 20. It really speaks to me and about me. It is wierd because i feel as though someone is saying exactly what I am feeling. Especially the "I'm scared that I will never, get put back together". Such a scary thought, isn't it? What if I will forever be this bent and this broken? Like I needed one more thing to worry about... good job me, I should be patting me on the back for this new thought that I just had!!!

Oh well, back to the books....

Sunday, November 5, 2006

On being irritated...

What is up with people calling you to "chat", then have conversations with people around them, expect you not to get pissed off and get offended when you say "if you are talking to me, talk to me; if you are talking to them, then go".

WTF? Seriously!!! Sometimes people can be so obnoxious, idiotic and inconsiderate. Sometimes, all i want to do is close my eyes and be elsewhere where no such person exists!!!


Saturday, November 4, 2006

I am an ASS

Today I spoke to my mother and she passed on some bad news. My grandma, the only grandparent I have ever met or known in my life, is not doing so good. Two years ago, she had what we call a "cold stroke" in Arabic. What this did is leave her paralyzed from the waste down and affected her memory a little. However, according to my mom, now it is getting worse. When my mom and dad went to see her a few days ago when they were in Lebanon, she did not recognize them... she did not recognize her own daughter and son-in-law!!!!!!!!!!!! My dad says pray for her and my mom says that she is scared to come visit me here because she is terrified that something will happen to my grandmother.
What if something did happen? She is the only one i have ever known from my grandparents. Last time i saw her was last summer, and i did not hang with her too much because it pained me so much to see her that way. What if i will not get a chance to say goodbye? I never got to know her as well as i would have liked as i was to young before, and now that I am older, she is not doing well. I have never had my morning coffee with her like all my cousins, including my sister and brother have. I have never told her how much I loved her. I have never even been shopping with her! i never told her about my boyfriends... Shit.... she might not even be there when I graduate and have my degree. She held me in her arms when I was first born, I saw her every summer till I was 14 and decided that Lebanon was so "uncool" and wanted to only spend my summers in Europe.
What will happen if I do not see her again? What will happen if i do not give her one last hug and tell her how much I love her? What then? I did not even call her for Eid. I am officially the worst grand-daughter she has ever had. I never call her just to say hi, I never travel just to see her, I never hang with her......... and now, she might forever be going away.
As a child, I never imagined I will ever say goodbye to someone dear to me. Then, one day, my friends' mother passed away, then my uncle, then some family friends... then it hit me. No one will live forever, life is just this. Saying goodbye and moving on.
Grandma, I am so sorry I never called you and I was too selfish to hang out with you... Please stay... its not time yet.

Friday, November 3, 2006

Buddhist thought of today

"What do you have to do? Pack your bags, Go to the station without them, Catch the train, And leave your self behind." - Open Secret by Wei Wu Wei

Makes sense, does it not?!!! Maybe that is what I will do when the day comes and I have to get on that plane. I will physically board it, but leave "me" behind. That would be nice....


C!!!!!! I miss you girlie!!! Yalla come back to Montreal so that we could chill and chat and smoke and party and..... well, you get the idea!!!!!!

Me miss you!

Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Can't sleep...

This is serious. I have the sleeping pills, I just can't get myself to take them. It is like, whenever I try a thought flashes through my head : Sleep and do what?!

Is that crazy, or is it normal if you go for so long without sleep?!!


Me tired, me thinks i will go sleep. Goodnight and happy halloween.

Sunday, October 29, 2006

Hangover..................................... and a half!

Yesterday i went out to this Arabic place called L mondo wit some friends. It was fun, i
danced my ass off and just met new people.

Today, I woke up with a
hangover and a half. i had actually forgotten what they felt like until now. I
woke up feeling extremely queasy, unable to breathe, light/heavy headed and
very, I repeat, VERY sensitive to noise. Last time i had a hangover this bad was
before the Christmas holidays last year. i was travelling in the afternoon so my
friend and i decide to get drunk the night before. Boy did we get drunk! We
drank a whole bottle of Smirnoff Vodka straight up in shots. We did some juice shots, but
then decided against them as they made everything worse.

Hangover is still
here, of course.
My stupid neighbour is moving and was therefore screaming at
the top of her lungs when telling her friends what to do. Like it is 9 am, why
cant you just speak in a normal voice????

I still feel drunk,
actually, more like tipsy. Me happy!!! =)

Saturday, October 28, 2006

The clouds are parting...

Wow, October is almost over and November is knocking hard on
the door. So far, although i have had many more downs than ups, I must admit, I
am enjoying my last few months here. I am always surrounded by great people and
friends and i think that that is what counts in the long run. I am partying like
I have never partied before -seriously, I never party!- and just enjoying my

I think it is finally sinking in and i am finally
potentially accepting it. I am leaving and that is that. Someone advised me to
not fret over it. That person told me to go back, put my bags down, settle down
and then let life unravel. He said that life will go on, and I believe him.

Actually, today is the first in a long time were
i wake up thinking that today is a good day. Who knows, it might just

Thursday, October 26, 2006


Yet another not-so-important piece of knowledge from

"Americans cite November as the most stressful month of the year."

Could it be because I was born in November?!!!


Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Alternate Future?

Today, it popped up twice that I could have gone to Ottawa U or Carlton U and obtained a degree in International business rather than the Poli Sci one i will have soon. Twice, in one day. I find that really wierd. I never thought about it, even now, I still do not know why it is that I did not go. I got a scholarship and everything. I even had a dorm room waiting for me. All I had to do was show up, agree, decide. I didn't, however. I refused. I did not want to end up in Ottawa. I did not want to end up in Business, and I sure as hell did not know what I wanted. So, Concordia was the answer. Do I regret it? Hell no! It was an exciting ride. It provided me with much needed experience and loaded me with insight. Yup, I might bitch and whine about Concordia most of the time, but to be honest, I wouldn't trade it for the world.

Tuesday, October 24, 2006


This I got from

"The proteins in milk have been shown to drastically reduce libido. "

Is this interesting or what?!!! Imagine! Why would anyone in their right minds drink milk now??? I am sorry, but I for one, believe that this outweighs any benfits it may have on my health. My libido!!!!!!!!!!

Monday, October 23, 2006

Not Eid for All...

Translation: It is a sin to cry on the day of Eid, my son....
Naji Al Ali is one of the best political cartoonists to have ever lived. I shall compile a short biography about him and post it soon!

Eid Mubarak

Well, today is Eid. Eid is a Muslim celebration to end the holy month of Ramadan. It is typically a three day event whereby family and friends meet and greet each other, prayers are preformed, and money and food given to the poor. It is a beautiful time if you are lucky enough to be surrounded by those dearest to you. Above all else, however, it is a time to kick back, relax and enjoy the great food and sweets that are usually served with not-so-great company.

Ahhh yes, I remember what Eid was like. Last time I celebrated Eid was 6 years ago. 6 years... that is a hell of a long time to go without it. No wonder that sometimes i feel that I am no longer connected... it is probably because in 6 years, whatever connection I had, I have lost.

Last Eid I had was in 2001. I remember waking up in the morning to the smell of my dads perfume -he had just walked past my room-, to the sound of my mom's hairdryer, to the sound of the phone ringing nonstop and finally, to the sound of the T.V where they were broadcasting the Eid prayer live from one of the mosques.We would all put on our best clothes, get ready, then go out for Lunch. Usually my dad invites family and close friends for stuffed veal, or kharoof mi7shi-. A lot has changed since then. For starters, as my sister puts it, now you wake up to the voice of her kid and my brothers kid screaming. It is a different house too, since my parents moved recently. Even the head of state has changed as the Sheikh died 2 years ago.

So that is what my Eid was like then. My Eid now? Nonexistent. I have no one to celebrate with, and even if i did, i can't. I have three classes first thing in the morning, starting at 8:45 am. I do not even feel it is Eid in this country... 6 years, BIG change...


I hate human kind sometimes. Seriously! What is the need for war? Why is it always the innocent and the poor that get hurt badly???

This article really got my blood boiling. Do we, as humans, really find it necessary to inflict that much pain and suffering on fellow humans? Do we really need to possess such harmful weapons whose use needs to be regulated by international treaties that are not obeyed most of the time?!

Israelis dropped phosphorous bombs in

October 23 2006
The Israeli army dropped phosphorous bombs against Hizbollah
guerrilla targets in Lebanon during the war in August, an Israeli minister said
yesterday, confirming Lebanese allegations for the first time.Phosphorus weapons
can cause severe burns and are banned for use in civilian areas, but Israel
insisted it used the weapons in accordance with international law."The Israeli
army made use of phosphorous shells during the war against Hizbollah in attacks
against military targets in open ground," Cabinet Minister Yaakov Edri said.The
Lebanese government had accused Israel of dropping such bombs during the
conflict.Until now, Israel had said it used the weapons only to mark targets or
territory, the Israeli daily Haaretz reported.Edri said international law did
not ban the use of phosphorous weapons. However, many rights groups, including
the Red Cross, have pushed to ban the weapons. The Geneva Conventions ban using
white phosphorous against civilians or civilian areas. More than 1200 civilians
were killed on both sides during the conflict, which started with Hizbollah's
kidnapping of two Israeli soldiers in July.Israel has been accused of firing up
to four million cluster bombs into Lebanon during the war, especially in the
hours before the ceasefire. UN experts say up to one million cluster bombs
failed to explode immediately and continue to threaten civilians.The UN Mine
Action Centre says at least 21 people have been killed and more than 100 wounded
by cluster bombs since the end of the war. A cluster bomb killed a 12-year-old
boy and injured his brother in southern Lebanon yesterday. Hizbollah has been
criticised for failing to distinguish between Israeli civilian and military
targets. Meanwhile, Israeli Defence Minister Amir Peretz said air force flights
over Lebanon would continue because arms smuggling to Lebanese guerrillas had
not stopped.Several ministers also called for a military operation to retake
control of Gaza's southern border and prevent Palestinian militants smuggling
weapons from neighbouring Egypt.-AP

Saturday, October 21, 2006

= )

Me Happy. Today, it flurried for the first time. Winter is officially here. I love the winter. There is something so right about it. It brings in a new hope for life.

Me Happy... wait a minute, I just said that. Oh well....

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Buddhist thought of the day:

"To gain that worth having, it may be necessary to lose everything else. - Bernadette Devlin"

Interesting, no?


Remember my "Mmm" post on September 22, 2006?

that same wierdo was ta the coffee shop again today and he started telling me
how pretty I was. Then this is the conversation that took place:

"Everytime I see you I cry"

"Thank you, but why?"

Wierdo: " You
are not even 22 yet"

Me: "and
that makes you cry?"

"No, its just that someone like you will never go out with an old fart such as
"Chances are, you are right"


Sunday, October 15, 2006


You kno w taht yoiu have lived in Montgreal far too long when you Actualy enjoy the smell of burning herbs....


Saturday, October 14, 2006

Poor little chick...

So true...

I was going through my archives and I find this picture. Now I am not sure when it was taken exactly, but I am pretty sure it is from Sky News, a US news network. So, here it is:

He he he heeeee

My friend, who is from Palestinian origins but can
barely speak the language, was saying proudly that she should have been in
Lebanon in the 70s before the civil war. She stands there and explains herself.
Her explanation:

" I would have been giving weapons and stuff for the

Ahem, sorry dear, but I am Prettttttty sure it is


Friday, October 13, 2006

Words of wisdom...

Be afraid, America. Be very

By Bradley

Note: This article will be followed by an experiment. In an
effort to foster rational dialogue, Talkback responses to this piece will be
subject to stringent new guidelines, as specified below.

We have met the enemy, and, all too often, he looks
like us.

The United States has spent
breathtaking sums since September 11 to assure that people who look like
Mohammed Atta don't walk onto airplanes, take thousands of innocent lives, and
destroy embodiments of the nation's majesty.But what if the terrorist you're
looking for is not an Arab, not a Muslim, not swarthy and foreign-born and, yes,
alien?What if he looks and acts the way Americans used to believe that real
Americans were supposed to look: cool, quiet, Christian and, yes, white?What if
he's the guy from the Norman Rockwell calendar, the knowing veteran at the
hardware store, the serious, courteous, diffident rock on which the All-American
empire was built?After the vast resources sinkholed into Homeland Security, what

if the most immediate, the most likely, the most realistic terrorist threat to
America, is the white male who votes Bush, goes to church, mows and edges his
lawn, and one clear morning gathers his firearms and ammunition and walks into a

We don't want to think about him. We prefer our terrorists wild-eyed and
fanatic, turbaned and howling, bearded and masked and glaring and gowned.We
don't want to think about profiling Charles Whitman. We don't want to think that
the gifted student, the accomplished pianist, the Eagle Scout who grows to
become the Marine who wins the Good Conduct medal, married to his hardworking,
supportive sweetheart, will one day climb a clock tower, shoot 14 passersby to
death, and wound dozens more.We have privacy issues, we Americans do.We respect
the privacy of our neighbors. So much so that we may live next to them for 20
years and know them not at all.We respect the privacy of the quiet, the
keep-to-himself kind of guy. Maybe a little scary. But that's his business, not
ours.Until he walks into a school. Until he trains his handgun, his assault
rifle, his shotgun, his deer rifle, on girls in the school, authority figures in
the school, anyone who gets in his way.Or until he walks into the workplace,
opening fire on colleagues or former colleagues, bosses or former bosses. Anyone
who gets in his way.Be afraid, America. Be very afraid. And hire guards. Place
them at the entrances to your schools. Keep that guy out. I'm not talking
Mohammed Atta. I'm talking that guy who looks like you're supposed to look, if
you live in America.Keep him out. It's a gun-happy country. There must be a few
weapons left over to bar his entry. If the guard sees he has a gun, the guard
should be trained and ready to drop him before he drops a single child. Keep him
out, America. You'll never forgive yourself if you don't.

I'm tired...

I just sentenced someone to academic death. I had a say in it. I fought for him but I could not stop it. I sat there and heard the verdict. I sat there knowing that although he is an idiot, expulsion is too drastic. I sat there, and then I left... and I knew that i will never be the same again...

Thursday, October 12, 2006


This pretty much reflects what Arabic music has come to nowadays.


Wednesday, October 11, 2006

A ray of light in a storm...

This made me forget my hatred for Concordia for a few seconds, when I
remembered it again. Well, just visualizing bureaucrats being terrorized by
monkeys... hehehehe. Top secret documents flying around and stuff... too goo to
be true, but thank God, it is.

Delhi monkeys face forest future
By Sanjoy Majumder BBC
News, Delhi

India's Supreme Court has ordered 300 monkeys captured from the
streets of
Delhi to be transferred to forests in the central state of Madhya
Thousands of monkeys roam the capital, mostly around government
offices, and
are considered a public nuisance.
They have terrorised
bureaucrats and in
one instance even ripped up top secret defence documents.
But the monkeys
are viewed as sacred by India's Hindus, who often feed
them, encouraging them to
Snatching food
Delhi's large
population of stray monkeys has
been a long-standing problem.
They are
also a public menace in many
residential neighbourhoods, where they snatch
food from unsuspecting people,
including children.
The fact that most
Hindus view the monkeys as sacred has
made it even harder for the
authorities to get rid of the animals.
Now the
Supreme Court has ordered
that some 300 monkeys captured by animal handlers be
freed in the forests of
central India as part of an effort to rehabilitate them.
But already there
are some who are opposing the move, saying the monkeys may
find it difficult
to adjust to life in the wild after having been raised in an

Story from

Published: 2006/10/11 15:23:58 GMT© BBC

Hate Hate Hate Hate Hate hate Hate Hate HAAAAAAATTTEEEEE!!!

I just wrote a whole blog about why i hate Concordia so much, and blogger deleted it while I was still in the process of editing it. That made my day- NOT!

Anyways, to make a whole story short, all you have to know is that I hate Concordia so much, I can't wait to get my diploma and get the hell away from it.



This is the new "little Mr.________" cartoons:

I just took a " Leader test" and this is my result:

you could find the test on

Interesting meeting...

Well, today I met up with this guy from
my village in Palestine, whome I found and emailed thru It was
so wierd and cool at the same time. Wierd because there I was, sitting with
someone who was nothing but a screen name a few days ago. Also, wierd because
even though either one of us have never been to Palestine, let alone 'Alma, here
we are meeting and having coffee in Montreal. It was cool because this guy is
from the same tiny piece of land that I am from yo! It is also cool because as
we talked more, we realized that there is a huge chance that we could be related
to one another! Actually, this is both cool and wierd at the same time.
It always strikes me as odd how connected
we still are to a land that we have never seen for generations. Wow, I guess the
love for a land is not learne, it is passed on from fathers and mothers to their
sons and daughters. The need to belong is nagging at all of us. We all feel
incomplete, like osmething is missing from us, we just do not know what it is.
Well, we do know what it is, it is our homeland. Actually, this reminds me
of an old song I love, it is "River of Dreams" by Billy Joel. I
especially love the following part:
"I'm a searcher for something
Taken out of my soul
Something i'd never lose
Something somebody stole"


Today's' summary:

- 7 espresso shots
- 3 fruit
- 1 salad and grilled chicken (yummy)
- 0 H2O
- Cereal and
- More espresso shots

Summary of the above summary:

think I might be addicted to coffee seeing as it does absolutely nothing
my system. I'm still as brain dead and tired as I was when I first got up
this morning.

I also think I should try to drink more water... I do not want to end up
dehydrated and in hospital any time soon. Maybe tomorrow?

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Hee hee heeee

I just got this via e-mail. It is hilarious!!

English translation:

"George Bush is an Ass and this American standing next to me doesn't
understand anything written on this cardboard. GO Iraq GO."

Jelly or toxic wastes?

You know something is wrong in the world when Jelly is mistaken for "toxic wastes" and the bomb squad is called in. Check it out on:

Well, at least we know that after they "cleared" it, they left it there and asked someone else to clean it....

Ma badddiiiii... =(

Well, this is what I call an annoyingly unlucky stroke of luck. Remember the ice cream I wanted here in Montreal? Well, I wanted one in Toronto, and surprise surprise, the shops either did not carry it or they had it but in yogurt ice cream.

Seriously speaking, I think this ice cream will be the end of me if I ever eat it. Maybe I'll get food poisoning or something... I'll steer clear from it from now on...

Monday, October 9, 2006


I finallllly had Red Lobster. For those of you who do not know what Lobster is, it is a seafood restaurant that is famous for, well what else?, Lobster. I also had shrimp and crab though...

This is what remained of the crab I ate, it was delicious!